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Effective Highlighting Will Result in at Least 60 Percent of a Paragraph Being Marked for Review

Chapter 12. Peer Review and Final Revisions

12.one Revision

Learning Objectives

  • Identify major areas of concern in the typhoon essay during revising
  • Use peer reviews and checklists to assistance revising
  • Revise your newspaper to improve system and cohesion
  • Determine an appropriate style and tone for your paper
  • Revise to ensure that your tone is consistent
  • Revise the first draft of your essay and produce a final draft

Revising and editing are the two tasks yous undertake to significantly improve your essay. Both are very important elements of the writing process. Y'all may think that a completed first typhoon means that piddling improvement is needed. Nevertheless, even experienced writers need to meliorate their drafts and rely on peers during revising and editing. You lot may know that athletes miss catches, bollix assurance, or overshoot goals. Dancers forget steps, turn too slowly, or miss beats. For both athletes and dancers, the more than they practice, the stronger their performance will go. Web designers seek better images, a more clever pattern, or a more appealing background for their web pages. Writing has the same capacity to profit from improvement and revision.

You should revise and edit in stages: do not expect to catch everything in one go. If each time yous review your essay you lot focus on a different attribute of construction, you volition be more likely to catch any mistakes or identify whatsoever issues. Throughout this chapter, you volition run into a number of checklists containing specific things to look for with each revision. For instance, you will offset look at how the overall paper and your ideas are organized.

In the second department of this chapter, you lot will focus more on editing: correcting the mechanical issues. As well at the end of the affiliate, y'all will see a comprehensive but more general list of things you should be looking for.

Agreement the Purpose of Revising and Editing

Revising and editing allow you to examine two important aspects of your writing separately, so that you can give each job your undivided attention.

When you revise , you have a 2d look at your ideas. You might add together, cutting, move, or change information in social club to brand your ideas clearer, more accurate, more than interesting, or more than convincing.

When you edit , you take a second look at how yous expressed your ideas. You add together or modify words. You fix any problems in grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure. Yous improve your writing mode. You make your essay into a polished, mature piece of writing, the cease product of your best efforts.

Tip

How do y'all go the best out of your revisions and editing? Here are some strategies that writers accept developed to look at their get-go drafts from a fresh perspective. Endeavour them throughout the writing process; so keep using the ones that bring results.

Take a pause. You are proud of what you wrote, but y'all might be too close to it to make changes. Gear up aside your writing for a few hours or even a day until you can look at it objectively.

Enquire someone you trust for feedback and constructive criticism.

Pretend yous are one of your readers. Are you satisfied or dissatisfied? Why?

For many people, the wordscritic,critical, andcriticism provoke only negative feelings that make them blush, grumble, or shout. Still, as a writer and a thinker, you demand to larn to be critical of yourself in a positive way and have high expectations for your work. You also need to train your eye and trust your ability to ready what needs fixing. To do this, you need to teach yourself where to look.

Revising Your Paper: Arrangement , Cohesion , and Unity

When writing a enquiry newspaper, it is easy to go overly focused on editorial details, such as the proper format for bibliographical entries. These details practise matter. However, before you begin to address them, it is important to spend time reviewing and revising the content of the paper.

A good research paper is both organized and cohesive.Organisation means that your argument flows logically from i point to the next.Cohesion means that the elements of your paper work together smoothly and naturally. In a cohesive research paper, information from research is seamlessly integrated with the author's ideas.

Revise to Improve Organization

When you revise to improve organization, y'all look at the flow of ideas throughout the essay every bit a whole and inside private paragraphs. You check to encounter that your essay moves logically from the introduction to the body paragraphs to the determination, and that each section reinforces your thesis. Utilize Checklist 12.ane : Revise for Organization to assistance you.

Checklist 12.1 : Revise for Organization

At the essay level

Does my introduction keep clearly from the opening to the thesis?

Does each body paragraph take a articulate main thought that relates to the thesis?

Practice the main ideas in the body paragraphs flow in a logical order? Is each paragraph connected to the one before it?

Do I demand to add or revise topic sentences or transitions to make the overall menstruation of ideas clearer?

Does my conclusion summarize my main ideas and revisit my thesis?

At the paragraph level

Does the topic judgement clearly country the principal idea?

Do the details in the paragraph relate to the main thought?

Exercise I need to recast any sentences or add transitions to improve the flow of sentences?

Jorge reread his typhoon paragraph by paragraph. As he read, he highlighted the main idea of each paragraph then he could see whether his ideas proceeded in a logical lodge. For the most part, the flow of ideas was clear. Yet, he did notice that one paragraph did non have a clear primary idea. It interrupted the period of the writing. During revision, Jorge added a topic judgement that clearly continued the paragraph to the one that had preceded it. He too added transitions to improve the menstruum of ideas from sentence to sentence.

Read the following paragraphs twice, the start time without Jorge's changes, and the second time with them.

chap12_1

Self practice Practise 12.one

Follow these steps to begin revising your newspaper's overall organization.

Print out a hard copy of your paper. (You will use this for multiple self-exercise exercises in this chapter.)

Read your paper paragraph by paragraph. Highlight your thesis and the topic judgement of each paragraph.

Using the thesis and topic sentences as starting points, outline the ideas you presented—just as you lot would do if you were outlining a affiliate in a textbook. Exercise not wait at the outline you created during prewriting. You may write in the margins of your draft or create a formal outline on a separate sheet of paper.

Next, reread your newspaper more slowly, looking for how ideas flow from judgement to sentence. Place places where adding a transition or recasting a sentence would make the ideas flow more logically.

Review the topics on your outline. Is there a logical catamenia of ideas? Place any places where you may demand to reorganize ideas.

Begin to revise your newspaper to improve organization. Starting time with whatever major issues, such every bit needing to move an unabridged paragraph. And then go on to minor revisions, such every bit adding a transitional phrase or tweaking a topic sentence so it connects ideas more clearly.

Optional collaboration: P charter share your paper with a classmate. Repeat the six steps and take notes on a separate piece of paper. Share and compare notes.

Tip

Writers choose transitions carefully to show the relationships betwixt ideas—for case, to make a comparison or elaborate on a point with examples. Make certain your transitions suit your purpose and avert overusing the same ones.

Creating Coherence

Careful writers use transitions to clarify how the ideas in their sentences and paragraphs are related. These words and phrases aid the writing flow smoothly. Calculation transitions is not the but way to improve coherence, only they are frequently useful and give a mature feel to your essays. Earlier chapters have discussed using transitions for specific purposes in the planning of your writing.Table 12.ane: Mutual Transitional Words and Phrases groups many common transitions co-ordinate to their purpose.

Table 12.1: Common Transitional Words and Phrases According to Purpose

Transitions That Show Sequence or Time
after before after
afterward earlier long meanwhile
every bit soon as finally next
at first beginning, second, third soon
at last in the first place so
Transitions That Testify Position
higher up across at the bottom
at the summit behind below
beside across inside
near next to opposite
to the left, to the correct, to the side under where
Transitions That Show a Conclusion
indeed hence in decision
in the concluding assay therefore thus
Transitions That Continue a Line of Thought
consequently furthermore additionally
because besides the fact following this idea farther
in improver in the same manner moreover
looking further because…, it is clear that
Transitions That Change a Line of Thought
merely still however
nevertheless on the contrary on the other mitt
Transitions That Bear witness Importance
above all best especially
in fact more important >near important
most worst
Transitions That Introduce the Concluding Thoughts in a Paragraph or Essay
finally last in conclusion
near of all to the lowest degree of all last of all
All Purpose Transitions to Open Paragraphs or to Connect Ideas Inside Paragraphs
admittedly at this point certainly
granted it is true generally speaking
in general in this state of affairs no incertitude
no i denies obviously of course
to exist sure undoubtedly unquestionably
Transitions that Introduce Examples
for case for case such every bit
Transitions That Clarify the Order of Events or Steps
showtime, second, tertiary generally, furthermore, finally in the first place, also, last
in the first place, furthermore, finally in the first place, likewise, lastly

When Mariah (who you were introduced to in Chapters 5 and 6) revised her essay for unity, she examined her paragraph about televisions to check for coherence. She looked for places where she needed to add a transition or maybe reword the text to make the flow of ideas clear. In the version that follows, she has already deleted the sentences that were off topic.

Tip

Many writers make their revisions on a printed copy and so transfer them to the version on screen. They conventionally use a small arrow chosen a caret (^) to show where to insert an addition or correction.

chap12_2

Self do EXERCISE 12.2

Answer the following questions about Mariah's revised paragraph.

Do you agree with the transitions and other changes that Mariah made to her paragraph? Which would you proceed and which were unnecessary? Explain.

What transition words or phrases did Mariah add to her paragraph? Why did she choose each one?

What event does calculation boosted sentences take on the coherence of the paragraph? Explain. When you read both versions aloud, which version has a more than logical flow of ideas? Explain.

Revise to Better Cohesion

When you revise to improve cohesion, you analyze how the parts of your paper work together. You await for anything that seems awkward or out of place. Revision may involve deleting unnecessary material or rewriting parts of the newspaper so that the out of place textile fits in smoothly.

In a research paper, problems with cohesion normally occur when a writer has trouble integrating source material. If facts or quotations accept been awkwardly dropped into a paragraph, they distract or misfile the reader instead of working to back up the writer'southward point. Overusing paraphrased and quoted material has the same upshot. Use Checklist 12.2 : Revise for Cohesion to review your essay for cohesion.

Checklist 12.ii : Revise for Cohesion

Does the opening of the paper clearly connect to the broader topic and thesis? Brand sure entertaining quotes or anecdotes serve a purpose.

Have I included support from inquiry for each main point in the body of my paper?

Accept I included introductory material earlier any quotations? Quotations should never stand up alone in a paragraph.

Does paraphrased and quoted material clearly serve to develop my ain points?

Practise I need to add to or revise parts of the paper to help the reader understand how certain information from a source is relevant?

Are in that location any places where I have overused material from sources?

Does my conclusion make sense based on the rest of the paper? Make certain any new questions or suggestions in the conclusion are clearly linked to earlier material.

Equally Jorge reread his draft, he looked to see how the dissimilar pieces fit together to prove his thesis. He realized that some of his supporting information needed to be integrated more carefully and decided to omit some details entirely. Read the following paragraph, kickoff without Jorge's revisions then with them.

chap12_3

Jorge decided that his comment near pizza and birthday cake came across as subjective and was not necessary to make his signal, so he deleted information technology. He also realized that the quotation at the end of the paragraph was awkward and ineffective. How would his readers know who Kwon was or why her stance should be taken seriously? Adding an introductory phrase helped Jorge integrate this quotation smoothly and found the credibility of his source.

Self practice EXERCISE 12.3

Follow these steps to begin revising your newspaper to amend cohesion.

Print out a hard copy of your paper, or work with your printout fromSelf Practice Practice 12.1.

Read the trunk paragraphs of your paper first. Each time you lot come to a place that cites information from sources, enquire yourself what purpose this information serves. Bank check that it helps back up a point and that it is clearly related to the other sentences in the paragraph.

Identify unnecessary data from sources that you can delete.

Identify places where you lot demand to revise your writing and so that readers empathise the significance of the details cited from sources.

Skim the body paragraphs once more, looking for whatsoever paragraphs that seem packed with citations. Review these paragraphs advisedly for cohesion.

Review your introduction and conclusion. Make sure the information presented works with ideas in the body of the newspaper.

Revise the places yous identified in your paper to improve cohesion.

Optional c ollaboration: P lease exchange papers with a classmate. Complete stride four . On a separate slice of newspaper, note whatsoever areas that would benefit from description. Return and compare notes.

Writing at Work

Understanding cohesion can also benefit you in the workplace, especially when you have to write and deliver a presentation. Speakers sometimes rely on beautiful graphics or funny quotations to concur their audience's attending. If y'all choose to utilise these elements, brand certain they work well with the noun content of your presentation. For example, if yous are asked to give a financial presentation, and the financial report shows that the company lost money, funny illustrations would non be relevant or advisable for the presentation.

Tip

Reading your writing aloud volition often help you lot find problems with unity and coherence. Listen for the clarity and flow of your ideas. Identify places where you lot discover yourself dislocated, and write a note to yourself almost possible fixes.

Creating Unity

Sometimes writers get caught upwards in the moment and cannot resist a skilful digression. Even though y'all might enjoy such detours when you chat with friends, unplanned digressions commonly harm a slice of writing.

Following your outline closely offers yous a reasonable guarantee that your writing will stay on purpose and not drift away from the controlling idea. However, when writers are rushed, are tired, or cannot detect the right words, their writing may become less than they want it to be. Their writing may no longer be clear and concise, and they may add information that is not needed to develop the main idea.

When a piece of writing hasunity, all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay clearly belong and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense. When the writing hascoherence, the ideas flow smoothly. The wording clearly indicates how i idea leads to another within a paragraph and from paragraph to paragraph.

Mariah stayed close to her outline when she drafted the three body paragraphs of her essay she tentatively titled "Digital Technology: The Newest and the Best at What Toll?" But a recent shopping trip for an HDTV upset her enough that she digressed from the principal topic of her third paragraph and included comments about the sales staff at the electronics shop she visited. When she revised her essay, she deleted the off-topic sentences that afflicted the unity of the paragraph.

Read the following paragraph twice, the first time without Mariah'due south changes and the 2d time with them.

chap12_4

Self practice EXERCISE 12.iv

Answer the post-obit two questions about Mariah'southward paragraph:

Do you concur with Mariah's decision to brand the deletions she made? Did she cut too much, also little, or just enough? Explain.

Is the explanation of what screen resolution means a digression? Or is it audience friendly and essential to understanding the paragraph? Explain.

Collaboration: P charter share with a classmate and compare your answers.

Now, print out some other copy of your essay or use the printed version(s) you used in Cocky Practice Exercises 12.1 and 12.three . Reread it to find any statements that bear upon the unity of your writing. Decide how all-time to revise.

Tip

When you reread your writing to find revisions to make, look for each type of problem in a separate sweep. Read it straight through once to locate any problems with unity. Read it directly through a second time to discover bug with coherence. You may follow this aforementioned practice during many stages of the writing procedure.

Writing at Work

Many companies hire copy editors and proofreaders to aid them produce the cleanest possible final drafts of large writing projects. Copy editors are responsible for suggesting revisions and way changes; proofreaders check documents for any errors in capitalization, spelling, and punctuation that accept crept in. Many times, these tasks are washed on a freelance basis, with ane freelancer working for a variety of clients.

Using a Consistent Fashion and Tone

Once you are sure that the content of your paper fulfills your purpose, you can begin revising to improvemanner andtone. Together, your style and tone create the vocalism of your paper, or how you encounter to readers. Style refers to the way you use language as a writer—the sentence structures you use and the discussion choices you lot make. Tone is the attitude toward your subject and audition that yous convey through your give-and-take choice.

Determining an Appropriate Way and Tone

Although accepted writing styles will vary within different disciplines, the underlying goal is the same—to come across to your readers as a knowledgeable, authoritative guide. Writing nearly enquiry is like being a bout guide who walks readers through a topic. A stuffy, overly formal tour guide can make readers feel put off or intimidated. Likewise much informality or humour can make readers wonder whether the tour guide really knows what he or she is talking about. Extreme or emotionally charged language comes across as unbalanced.

To help prevent existence overly formal or informal, determine an appropriate fashion and tone at the beginning of the inquiry process. Consider your topic and audience because these can aid dictate style and tone. For case, a paper on new breakthroughs in cancer research should be more than formal than a paper on ways to become a adept night'south sleep.

A strong inquiry paper comes beyond equally straightforward, accordingly academic, and serious. Information technology is generally best to avoid writing in the first person, as this can brand your newspaper seem overly subjective and opinion based. Use Checklist 12.3 : Revise for Style to review your paper for other issues that touch on manner and tone. You tin can check for consistency at the end of the writing procedure. Checking for consistency is discussed afterward in this section.

Checklist 12.iii : Revise for Way

My paper avoids excessive wordiness.

My sentences are varied in length and structure.

I have avoided using first person pronouns such every bit I and we.

I accept used the active voice whenever possible.

I have divers specialized terms that might exist unfamiliar to readers.

I have used clear, straightforward linguistic communication whenever possible and avoided unnecessary jargon.

My paper states my signal of view using a balanced tone—neither as well indecisive nor too forceful.

Discussion Choice

Notation that word pick is an especially important aspect of style. In addition to checking the points noted on Checklist 12.3, review your newspaper to make certain your language is precise, conveys no unintended connotations, and is free of bias. Here are some of the points to check for:

Vague or imprecise terms

Slang

Repetition of the same phrases ("Smith states…, Jones states…") to innovate quoted and paraphrased material (For a full listing of strong verbs to apply with in text citations, seeAffiliate 9: Citations and Referencing.)

Exclusive use of masculine pronouns or awkward use ofhe or she

Use of language with negative connotations, such as haughty or ridiculous

Use of outdated or offensive terms to refer to specific ethnic, racial, or religious groups

Tip

Using plural nouns and pronouns or recasting a sentence can assist you go on your linguistic communication gender neutral while avoiding awkwardness. Consider the post-obit examples.

  • Gender biased : When a writer cites a source in the body of his paper, he must listing it on his references page.
  • Awkward : When a writer cites a source in the body of his or her paper, he or she must list it on his or her references folio.
  • Improved : Writers must list any sources cited in the body of a newspaper on the references page.

Keeping Your Style Consistent

Equally yous revise your paper, make certain your mode is consistent throughout. Look for instances where a give-and-take, phrase, or judgement does non seem to fit with the rest of the writing. It is best to reread for style later on you have completed the other revisions and so that you lot are non distracted by any larger content issues. Revising strategies you lot can use include the following:

Read your newspaper aloud. Sometimes your ears catch inconsistencies that your eyes miss.

Share your newspaper with some other reader whom you trust to give yous honest feedback. It is ofttimes difficult to evaluate one's own way objectively—especially in the concluding phase of a challenging writing project. Another reader may exist more likely to discover instances of wordiness, confusing language, or other issues that affect manner and tone.

Due east dit your paper slowly, judgement by judgement. Y'all may even wish to utilize a sheet of newspaper to cover upwards everything on the page except the paragraph you are editing. This practice forces you to read slowly and carefully. Mark any areas where you notice bug in style or tone, and and then take time to rework those sections.

On reviewing his paper, Jorge found that he had generally used an appropriately academic fashion and tone. Even so, he noticed one glaring exception—his offset paragraph. He realized there were places where his overly informal writing could come up beyond equally unserious or, worse, disparaging. Revising his discussion choice and omitting a humorous aside helped Jorge maintain a consequent tone. Read his revisions.

chap12_5

Self practice EXERCISE 12.5

Using Checklist 12.iii : Revise for Mode , revise your newspaper line by line. You may use either of these techniques:

Print out a hard copy of your paper or work with your printout fromSelf Practice Do 12.one. Read it line past line. Cheque for the issues noted on Checklist 12.3, too as whatever other aspects of your writing style you have previously identified as areas for improvement. Marking whatsoever areas where you lot find problems in fashion or tone, and then take time to rework those sections.

If you prefer to work with an electronic certificate, use the menu options in your discussion processing program to enlarge the text to 150 or 200 percent of the original size. Make sure the blazon is big plenty that you lot tin focus on one paragraph at a time. Read the paper line past line as described in step one. Highlight whatsoever areas where y'all notice issues in fashion or tone, and so take fourth dimension to rework those sections.

Optional c ollaboration: P lease exchange papers with a classmate. On a separate piece of paper, note places where the essay does non seem to flow or y'all accept questions nigh what was written. Return the essay and compare notes.

Completing a Peer Review

Later on working so closely with a slice of writing, writers ofttimes need to step dorsum and ask for a more objective reader. What writers need most is feedback from readers who can respond only to the words on the page. When they are ready, writers show their drafts to someone they respect and who tin give an honest response about its strengths and weaknesses.

You, too, can ask a peer to read your typhoon when it is ready. Later on evaluating the feedback and assessing what is most helpful, the reader's feedback volition help y'all when you revise your draft. This process is calledpeer review.

You can work with a partner in your class and place specific ways to strengthen each other's essays. Although you may be uncomfortable sharing your writing at first, remember that each writer is working toward the same goal: a final typhoon that fits the audition and the purpose. Maintaining a positive attitude when providing feedback will put you and your partner at ease. The box that follows provides a useful framework for the peer review session.

Questions for Peer Review: Organization, Unity, and Coherence

Title of essay: ____________________________________________

Date: ____________________________________________

Writer's name: ____________________________________________

Peer reviewer's name: _________________________________________

This essay is about____________________________________________.

Your master points in this essay are____________________________________________.

What I most liked near this essay is____________________________________________.

These three points struck me every bit your strongest:

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________

These places in your essay are not clear to me:

Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement because__________________________________________

Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement because ____________________________________________

Where: ____________________________________________

Needs comeback because ____________________________________________

The 1 additional change you could make that would improve this essay significantly is ____________________________________________.

Writing at Piece of work

One of the reasons why discussion processing programs build in a reviewing feature is that work groups accept become a common feature in many businesses. Writing is often collaborative, and the members of a work grouping and their supervisors often critique grouping members' work and offering feedback that will lead to a better final product.

Self practice Do 12.six

Exchange essays with a classmate and complete a peer review of each other's draft in progress. Remember to requite positive feedback and to exist courteous and polite in your responses. Focus on providing one positive comment and one question for more information to the author.

Using Feedback Objectively

The purpose of peer feedback is to receive constructive criticism of your essay. Your peer reviewer is your showtime real audition, and you have the opportunity to acquire what confuses and delights a reader so that you can improve your work before sharing the final draft with a wider audience (or your intended audience).

It may not be necessary to contain every recommendation your peer reviewer makes. All the same, if you start to observe a pattern in the responses you receive from peer reviewers, yous might desire to consider that feedback in future assignments. For case, if you read consistent comments about a need for more research, so you lot may want to consider including more than research in time to come assignments.

Using Feedback from Multiple Sources

You might go feedback from more than one reader as you share different stages of your revised draft. In this situation, you may receive feedback from readers who practice not understand the assignment or who lack your interest with and enthusiasm for it.

Yous need to evaluate the responses you receive according to two important criteria:

Determine if the feedback supports the purpose of the assignment.

Determine if the suggested revisions are appropriate to the audience.

And then, using these standards, accept or reject revision feedback.

Self practice EXERCISE 12.7

Consider the feedback you received from the peer review and all of the revision exercises throughout this section. Compile a concluding draft of your revisions that y'all can use in the next section to consummate your concluding edits.

Key Takeaways

  • Revising and editing are the stages of the writing process in which y'all improve your work before producing a final draft.
  • Unity in writing ways that all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay clearly belong together and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense.
  • Coherence in writing ways that the author'south wording clearly indicates how ane idea leads to some other within a paragraph and betwixt paragraphs.
  • Transitional words and phrases effectively make writing more coherent.
  • Writing should be clear and concise, with no unnecessary words.
  • Constructive formal writing uses specific, appropriate words and avoids slang, contractions, clichés, and overly full general words.
  • Peer reviews, done properly, tin can give writers objective feedback most their writing. Information technology is the writer's responsibility to evaluate the results of peer reviews and contain but useful feedback.

12.2 Editing and Developing a Final Draft of a Research Newspaper

Learning Objectives

  • Edit your paper to ensure that linguistic communication, citations, and formatting are right

Given all the time and effort you lot take put into your inquiry paper, you will want to make sure that your last draft represents your best piece of work. This requires taking the time to revise and edit your paper carefully.

You lot may feel like you need a intermission from your paper earlier yous edit it. That feeling is understandable, so you desire to be sure to leave yourself enough fourth dimension to complete this important stage of the writing procedure. This section presents a number of opportunities for you to focus on unlike aspects of the editing procedure; as with revising a typhoon, you should approach editing in different stages.

Some of the content in this department may seem repetitive, but over again, it provides you with a chance to double-cheque any revisions you lot have made at a detailed level.

Editing Your Draft

If yous take been incorporating each fix of revisions as Mariah and Jorge take, y'all have produced multiple drafts of your writing. So far, all your changes take been content changes. Maybe with the aid of peer feedback, you accept made sure that you lot sufficiently supported your ideas. You take checked for problems with unity and coherence. You have examined your essay for discussion choice, revising to cut unnecessary words and to supercede weak wording with specific and appropriate diction.

The adjacent step after revising the content is editing. When yous edit, you examine the surface features of your text. Y'all examine your spelling, grammar, usage, and punctuation. Yous likewise make sure you utilize the proper format when creating your finished assignment.

Tip

Editing takes time. Be sure to budget time into the writing process to complete additional edits after revising. Editing and proofreading your writing helps you create a finished work that represents your all-time efforts. Here are a few more tips to remember well-nigh your readers:

Readers do not discover right spelling, merely theydo discover misspellings.

Readers look past your sentences to become to your ideas—unless the sentences are bad-mannered, poorly constructed, and frustrating to read.

Readers notice when every sentence has the aforementioned rhythm as every other sentence, with no diversity.

Readers practise not cheer when y'all employthere,their, andthey're correctly, but they detect when you do not.

Readers will notice the care with which you handled your assignment and your attending to particular in the delivery of an mistake-free document.

Beingness Articulate and Concise

Some writers are very methodical and painstaking when they write a first draft. Other writers unleash a lot of words in lodge to get out all that they feel they need to say. Practise either of these methods match your manner? Or is your composing style somewhere in betwixt? No affair which description best fits yous, the first draft of near every piece of writing, no thing its writer, can be made clearer and more curtailed.

If you take a trend to write as well much, you will need to look for unnecessary words. If you have a tendency to be vague or imprecise in your wording, you will need to detect specific words to replace any overly general language.

Identifying Wordiness

Sometimes writers use too many words when fewer words will appeal more to their audition and better fit their purpose. Here are some common examples of wordiness to look for in your draft. Eliminating wordiness helps all readers, because information technology makes your ideas articulate, directly, and straightforward.

  • Sentences that brainstorm withThere isorThere are
  • Wordy . There are 2 major experiments that the Biology Section sponsors.
  • Revised . The Biology Department sponsors ii major experiments.
  • Sentences with unnecessary modifiers
  • Wordy . Two extremely famous and well-known consumer advocates spoke eloquently in favour of the proposed important legislation.
  • Revised . Two well-known consumer advocates spoke in favour of the proposed legislation.

Sentences with deadwood phrases that add piffling to the meaning. Be judicious when you lot utilise phrases such asin terms of,with a mind to,on the subject of,as to whether or not,more or less,every bit far as…is concerned, and like expressions. You can unremarkably find a more straightforward fashion to state your indicate.

  • Wordy . As a world leader in the field of green applied science, the company plans to focus its efforts in the area of geothermal energy. A report as to whether or not to utilise geysers as an free energy source is in the process of training.
  • Revised . As a world leader in greenish technology, the company plans to focus on geothermal free energy. Researchers are preparing a report about using geysers equally an free energy source.

Sentences in the passive voice or with forms of the verbto be : Sentences with passive phonation verbs oftentimes create defoliation because the subject of the sentence does not perform an action. Sentences are clearer when the field of study performs the activity and is followed by a potent verb. Use strong active vocalism verbs in place of forms ofto be, which tin lead to wordiness. Avert passive vocalism when yous can.

  • Wordy . It might peradventure be said that using a GPS device is something that is a benefit to drivers who have a poor sense of direction.
  • Revised . Using a GPS device benefits drivers who have a poor sense of direction.

Sentences with constructions that can be shortened

  • Wordy . The e-volume reader, which is a contempo invention, may become as commonplace equally the cell phone. My over-60 uncle bought an east-book reader, and his married woman bought an e-book reader, too.
  • Revised . The e-book reader, a contempo invention, may become as commonplace as the cell telephone. My over-60 uncle and his married woman both bought due east-book readers.

Choosing Specific, Appropriate Words

Most essays at the post-secondary level should be written in formal English language suitable for an academic situation. Follow these principles to exist sure that your give-and-take selection is appropriate. For more data nigh give-and-take choice, seeChapter two: Working with Words: Which Word Is Right?

Avoid slang . Observe alternatives tobummer,kewl, andrad.

Avoid linguistic communication that is overly casual . Write nearly "men and women" rather than "girls and guys" unless you are trying to create a specific effect. A formal tone calls for formal language.

Avert contractions . Usedo non in place ofdon't,I am in place ofI'grand,have non in place ofhaven't, and and then on. Contractions are considered casual voice communication.

Avoid clichés . Overused expressions such equallydark-green with envy,face the music,better late than never, and similar expressions are empty of meaning and may not appeal to your audience.

Exist conscientious when you lot use words that sound akin but have different meanings . Some examples areallusion/illusion; complement/compliment; council/counsel; concurrent/consecutive; founder/flounder; and historic/historical. When in uncertainty, bank check a dictionary.

Choose words with the connotations you lot want . Choosing a word for its connotations is equally important in formal essay writing every bit information technology is in all kinds of writing. Compare the positive connotations of the wordproud and the negative connotations ofbig-headed andcomplacent.

Employ specific words rather than overly general words . Find synonyms forthing,people,nice,good,bad,interesting, and other vague words. Or use specific details to brand your exact meaning clear.

Now read the revisions Mariah fabricated to make her third paragraph clearer and more curtailed. She has already incorporated the changes she made to improve unity and coherence.

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Self do EXERCISE 12.eight

Answer the following questions about Mariah's revised paragraph:

Read the unrevised and the revised paragraphs aloud. Explain in your own words how changes in discussion choice have affected Mariah's writing.

Do you lot agree with the changes that Mariah made to her paragraph? Which changes would yous keep and which were unnecessary? Explain. What other changes would you have fabricated?

What effect does removing contractions and the pronoun you have on the tone of the paragraph? How would you lot characterize the tone now? Why?

Now return over again to your essay in progress. Read advisedly for bug with word choice. Exist sure that your draft is written in formal language and that your word choice is specific and advisable.

Self practise EXERCISE 12.9

R eturn over again to the first draft of the essay you take been revising. Bank check it for unnecessary words.

Try making your sentences every bit curtailed equally they tin can be.

Brief Punctuation Review

Throughout this book, you have been presented with a number of tables containing transitional words. Table 12.2: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases shows many of the transition words you have seen organized into different categories to help you know how to punctuate with each one.

Table 12.2: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases

Joining Independent Clauses (coordination)
2 IND Coordinating conjunctions: FANBOYS Conjunctive adverbs and other transitional expressions
IND ; IND IND , ____ IND IND . _____, IND or IND ; _____, IND
for accordingly after all
and after a while besides
nor anyhow equally a result
but at any charge per unit at the same fourth dimension
or besides consequently
yet for case for instance
so furthermore hence
henceforth all the same
in addition indeed
in fact in other words
in particular instead
in the beginning place as well
meanwhile moreover
all the same nonetheless
on the opposite on the other paw
otherwise still
then therefore
thus
Forming Dependent Clauses (subordination)
IND + DEP or DEP , IND
after although as as if every bit though
because before if in order that since
so that that though unless until
when whenever where wherever
*which while who whom whose

* This row contains relative pronouns, which may be punctuated differently.

Joining Independent Clauses

There are 3 ways to join independent clauses. Past using a mix of all iii methods and varying your transition words, you lot will add complication to your writing and amend the flow. You will also be emphasizing to your reader which ideas yous want to connect or to prove things like cause and result or contrast. For a more than detailed review of independent clauses, expect dorsum at Chapter three: Putting Ideas into Your Ain Words and Paragraphs. Option 1 Past simply using a semicolon (;), y'all can make the ideas connect more than if yous were to use a flow. If you lot are trying to reinforce that connection, utilize a semicolon because it is not as strong of a pause as a period and reinforces the link. Option 2 When you want to link two independent sentences and increase the flow between ideas, you can add a comma and a coordinating conjunction betwixt them. With coordinating conjunctions (FANBOYS: for, and, nor, simply, or, yet, then), you do not use a comma every time: you would only do so if what is on either side of the conjunction is a complete sentence not just a phrase. You would not put a comma if you are merely giving a list of 2 items. For case:

Comma:It is cold outside, and then I wore an extra warm coat.

No comma: It is cold exterior. I wore an actress warm coat and gloves.

The first example contains a complete sentence (independent clause) on either side of the conjunction and so. Merely the conjunction by itself or just a comma by itself is not strong enough to bring together two independent clauses. However, if y'all put the 2 together with and so, you tin can link the two. In the 2nd example, and is but connecting two noun phrases: warm coat and gloves. What comes after the conjunction is not a consummate sentence, so yous would non add together a comma. To check if at that place is a complete, independent clause, ask yourself, "Tin can that part stand by itself as a complete judgement?" In the case of the no comma example, gloves is what comes after the comma. That is not a complete sentence, only a noun: that ways it is office of a list and is not a complete judgement = no comma. The bespeak of these examples was to bear witness you that you lot have to be conscientious how you utilise commas and conjunctions. Every bit piece of cake as it would exist to just always toss in a comma, doing and so would confuse your reader as what is and is non part of a list and what ideas are joined. Option three Your third option is to join ii independent clauses with a conjunctive adverb or another transition give-and-take. These words are very useful because they clearly show your reader how you would like your ideas to connect. If you wanted to emphasize contrasting ideas, yous would employ on the other paw or however. If you wanted to show cause and effect, you could apply as a result. Refer to the tables you have seen in other chapters to make sure yous are using the transitions y'all actually mean to exist using; then, check Table 12.2 to confirm how you should punctuate it. After your first contained clause, yous can choose to either use a period or a semicolon, once more depending on how much of a link you want to evidence. You lot may also want to consider how many long sentences yous take used prior to this. If you lot utilize a lot of complicated sentences, you should probably use a catamenia to let your reader to take a break. You must besides retrieve to include a comma after the transition discussion.

Period:It is cold outside. Therefore, I wore an extra warm coat.

Semicolon: It is cold outside; therefore, I wore an extra warm coat.

Joining Dependent Clauses

If one of the clauses in a sentence is independent and tin can stand up on its own, simply the other is not, you have to construct the sentence a trivial differently. Whenever you lot add a subordinating conjunction or relative pronoun to an contained sentence, you create a dependent clause—i that tin never stand alone. In the examples below, notice that when the contained clause comes first, it is strong plenty to bear the dependent clause at the cease without any helping punctuation. Even so, if yous desire the dependent clause showtime, yous must add a comma between it and the contained clause: the dependent clause is not potent enough to support the independent clause after without a fiddling assistance. In the examples below, the contained clauses are double underlined and the dependent clause has a single underline.

IND first:I wore an extra warm coat every bit it is cold outside.

DEP first: As information technology is common cold outside, I wore an extra warm coat.

Tip

If you want to offset a judgement with Because, you need to brand sure there is a second half to that judgement that is independent. A Considering (dependent) clause can never stand by itself.

At the bottom on Table 12.2, you lot can see a listing of v dependent markers that can be used a little differently. These are relative pronouns, and when you utilize them, you need to ask yourself if the information is 100 per centum necessary for the reader to empathise what you are describing. If it is optional, you can include a comma earlier the relative clause even if it comes later the independent clause.

Non essential:As information technology is cold exterior, I wore an extra warm coat, which was blue.

Essential: My coat which is blueish is the 1 I clothing when it is really cold outside.

In the non essential example, the fact that the coat was warm was probably more than important than that the glaze was blue. The information that the glaze is blue probably would not make a divergence in keeping the person warm, so the information in that relative clause is not terribly important. Adding the comma before the clause tells the reader it is extra information. In the essential example, the use of the same clause without a preceding comma shows that this information is important. The writer is implying he has other coats that are non as warm and are not blueish, so he is emphasizing the importance of the blue glaze. These are the just five subordinators, or relative pronouns, for which you lot can do this; every other 1 needs to follow the previous explanation of how to employ these dependent transition words. If you do determine to add a comma with 1 of the relative pronouns, you demand to think critically near whether or not that description is completely essential.

Using any of these sentence joining strategies is helpful in providing sentence variety to help your reader stay engaged and reading attentively. By post-obit these punctuation rules, y'all will as well avoid creating sentence fragments, run-on sentences, and comma splices, all of which improves your end product.

Given how much work y'all accept put into your inquiry newspaper, you will want to bank check for any errors that could distract or confuse your readers. Using the spell checking feature in your word processing program can exist helpful, it should not replace a full, careful review of your document. Be sure to bank check for any errors that may have come up frequently for you in the past. Use Checklist 12.4: Editing Your Writing to assist you as yous edit.

Checklist 12.4 : Editing Your Writing

Grammer

Are some sentences actually sentence fragments?

Are some sentences run-on? How can I correct them?

Practise some sentences need conjunctions betwixt independent clauses?

Does every verb agree with its subject?

Is every verb in the right tense?

Are tense forms, especially for irregular verbs, written correctly?

Take I used subject, object, and possessive personal pronouns correctly?

Take I usedwho andwhom correctly?

Is the antecedent of every pronoun clear?

Exercise all personal pronouns agree with their antecedents?

Have I used the right comparative and superlative forms of adjectives and adverbs?

Is it clear which word a participial phrase modifies, or is information technology a dangling modifier?

Sentence Construction

Are all my sentences simple sentences, or practise I vary my judgement construction?

Have I chosen the all-time coordinating or subordinating conjunctions to join clauses?

Have I created long, overpacked sentences that should exist shortened for clarity?

Do I run into any mistakes in parallel structure?

Punctuation

Does every sentence end with the correct end punctuation?

Tin I justify the employ of every exclamation indicate?

Have I used apostrophes correctly to write all singular and plural possessive forms?

Have I used quotation marks correctly?

Mechanics and Usage

Can I observe any spelling errors? How can I correct them?

Have I used uppercase letters where they are needed?

Accept I written abbreviations, where allowed, correctly?

Tin can I find any errors in the use of usually confused words, such as to/also/two?

Tip

Exist careful about relying too much on spelling checkers and grammar checkers. A spelling checker cannot recognize that you meant to write principle but wroteprincipal instead. A grammer checker often queries constructions that are perfectly right. The program does not empathize your meaning; it makes its check against a general set of formulas that might not apply in each instance. If you lot use a grammar checker, accept the suggestions that make sense, but consider why the suggestions came up.

Tip

Proofreading requires patience; it is very like shooting fish in a barrel to read past a error. Fix your paper aside for at least a few hours, if not a mean solar day or more, so your mind will residue. Some professional proofreaders read a text astern and then they can concentrate on spelling and punctuation. Some other helpful technique is to slowly read a paper aloud, paying attending to every word, letter of the alphabet, and punctuation marker.

If y'all need additional proofreading assist, ask a reliable friend, classmate, or peer tutor to brand a final pass on your newspaper to expect for anything you missed.

Formatting

Your finished assignment should exist properly formatted, following the style required of you. Formatting includes the manner of the title, margin size, page number placement, location of the writer's name, and other factors. Your teacher or department may crave a specific mode to be used. The requirements may be more detailed and rigid for research projects and term papers, which often observe the American Psychological Association (APA) manner guide, particularly when citations of sources are included.

To ensure the format is correct and follows whatever specific instructions, brand a final bank check earlier y'all submit an consignment.

Cocky- exercise EXERCISE 12.x

With the help of Checklist 12.4, edit and proofread your essay.

Checking Citations and Formatting

When editing a research paper, it is also important to bank check that you have cited sources properly and formatted your certificate according to the specified guidelines. There are two reasons for this. First, citing sources correctly ensures that you give proper credit to other people for ideas and information that helped you in your piece of work. Second, using right formatting establishes your paper as i student's contribution to the work adult past and for a larger academic customs. Increasingly, American Psychological Clan (APA) way guidelines are the standard for many academic fields. Use Checklist 12.five: Citations and Formatting to help.

Checklist 12.5 : Citations and Formatting

Within the trunk of my paper, each fact or thought taken from a source is credited to the correct source.

Each in-text citation includes the source author's name (or, where applicable, the organisation name or source title) and year of publication. I take used the correct format of in text and parenthetical citations.

Each source cited in the body of my paper has a corresponding entry in the references section of my paper.

My references section includes a heading and double-spaced alphabetized entries.

Each entry in my references section is indented on the second line and all subsequent lines.

Each entry in my references department includes all the necessary information for that source type, in the correct sequence and format.

My paper includes a title page.

My paper includes a running head.

The margins of my paper are prepare at 1 inch. Text is double spaced and ready in a standard 12-bespeak font.

For detailed guidelines on APA commendation and formatting, seeChapter 9: Citations and Referencing.

Writing at Work

Following APA commendation and formatting guidelines may require time and effort. Notwithstanding, it is skillful practice for learning how to follow accustomed conventions in any professional person field. Many big corporations create a way transmission with guidelines for editing and formatting documents produced by that corporation. Employees follow the way manual when creating internal documents and documents for publication.

During the procedure of revising and editing, Jorge fabricated changes in the content and style of his paper. He also gave the newspaper a final review to bank check for overall definiteness and, particularly, right APA citations and formatting. Read the final draft of his paper.

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With the help of Checklist 12.v, edit and proofread your essay.

Although y'all probably practice not want to look at your paper once again before y'all submit information technology to your instructor, take the time to do a terminal check. Since you have already worked through all of the checklists in a higher place focusing on certain aspects at one fourth dimension, working through one final checklist should confirm y'all take written a strong, persuasive essay and that everything is the way yous desire it to be. As extra insurance you accept produced a strong paper, you may even desire someone else to double-cheque your essay using C hecklist 12.6: Final Revision. Then y'all tin can compare to see how your perceptions of your newspaper match those of someone else, essentially having that person act as the one who will be grading your newspaper.

Checklist 12.6: Final Revision

Start Revision 1 : Organization
___ Practise y'all bear witness you understand the assignment: purpose, audience, and genre?
___ Focus: Take y'all clearly stated your thesis (your controlling idea) in the get-go paragraph?
___ Does your thesis statement grab the reader'due south attention?
___ Unity: Write your opening and closing paragraphs and place each topic judgement in between. You should have a "mini essay" with several different main points supporting your thesis.
___ Are your paragraphs organized in a logical style?
___ ___ Does each topic sentence (per paragraph) logically follow the one preceding it?
Exercise you have several points to support your thesis?
___ ___ ___ Check whether your paragraphs are organized co-ordinate to a specific pattern.
Would rearranging your paragraphs support your thesis improve?
Accept you provided a comprehensive conclusion to your essay? Does it summarize your main points (using different words)?
First Revision 2 : Paragraphs and Sentences
___ ___ ___ ___ ___   ___ ___ ___   ___   ___ Does each paragraph have primary points and supporting details?
Does each paragraph have only one main point?
Is your approach or blueprint used to develop your paragraph's primary indicate followed?
Check that each sentence is relevant to the chief point of the paragraph.
Are at that place several sentences giving details, facts, quotes, reasons, and arguments in each paragraph?
Is each supporting detail specific, physical, and relevant to the topic sentence?
Does each sentence logically follow the preceding i?
Take you used transitional words to help the reader follow your thoughts? If not, add together them.
Paragraph length: If also curt, develop farther. If too long, suspension into smaller paragraphs or consolidate some sentences.
Cheque your essay for tone and signal of view.
Second Revision ane : Sentences and Usage
___ ___ ___ ___ Confirm that each sentence has a subject and a verb.
Revise fragments, splices, and run-on sentences.
Check modifiers to see if they take been put in unclear places.
Do you have a multifariousness of sentence structures? (simple and complex)
___ ___   ___ ___ ___ Scan for subject-verb agreement in each sentence.
Are you consistent with your verb tenses? Check to make sure there are not any disruptive or irrelevant tense changes.
Make sure that words in lists are in parallel forms.
Think through your pronouns; what is each i referring to?
Cheque for confusing "person" shifts inside paragraphs. Keep the subjects consistent.
___ ___ ___ ___   ___ Place all verbs and alter whatsoever that are passive to active.
Use strong verbs not weak adverbs. Say something "is" non that information technology "may exist."
Cheque for wordiness.
Scan to make certain yous have not used the same give-and-take repeatedly in the same sentence and paragraph. Utilise a thesaurus.
Look for and eliminate clichés.
2nd Revision two : Documentation
___ ___ ___ ___ Have you documented all your references?
Have you used in text citations every time they were needed? Have yous formatted all your citations correctly?
Is your references' section consummate and right according to the JIBC APA Way Guide.
Second Revision 3 : Mechanics
___ ___ Check that all words and sentences are punctuated according to standard usage.
Check for spelling and typographical errors.
Third Revision: Content
___ ___ ___ ___ Read your essay aloud. Do yous believe what you have written?
At this point do you develop your controlling thought in a way that makes sense?
Have yous provided enough background information? Is it relevant/necessary?
Accept you primarily used paraphrasing as opposed to straight quotations?

You lot should now exist confident you have produced a strong statement that is wonderfully constructed and that you volition be able to persuade your audience that your points and point of view are valid.

Cardinal Takeaways

  • During revising, you add together, cut, move, or change information in order to improve content.
  • During editing, you take a second look at the words and sentences y'all used to express your ideas and fix any problems in grammer, punctuation, and judgement construction.
  • Recollect to budget fourth dimension for careful editing and proofreading. Utilize all available resource, including editing checklists, peer editing, and your institution'south writing lab, to meliorate your editing skills.
  • Organization in a research paper means that the statement proceeds logically from the introduction to the body to the conclusion. It flows logically from one point to the next. When revising a research paper, evaluate the organisation of the newspaper every bit a whole and the organisation of individual paragraphs.
  • In a cohesive research newspaper, the elements of the newspaper piece of work together smoothly and naturally. When revising a enquiry paper, evaluate its cohesion. In item, check that information from research is smoothly integrated with your ideas.
  • An constructive enquiry newspaper uses a manner and tone that are appropriately academic and serious. When revising a inquiry paper, check that the manner and tone are consistent throughout.
  • Editing a research paper involves checking for errors in grammar, mechanics, punctuation, usage, spelling, citations, and formatting.

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Source: https://opentextbc.ca/writingforsuccess/chapter/chapter-12-peer-review-and-final-revisions/